by Karen Kuebler

Do you ever cringe when family or friends call to let you know they are coming to town?  Some people are very comfortable with guests, love to entertain, and play the host or hostess very well.  Unfortunately, I’m not one of them!  I just wasn’t hardwired that way.  More...

I have, however, developed some techniques that have helped me to relax.  Now I actually enjoy our visits with friends and family.  I also have been concerned that visitors will enjoy their vacation when we need to carefully watch our spending.  Following are some ideas that have eliminated the pressure I used to experience when guests would

arrive.

Food

I purchase a variety of foods that can be eaten for breakfast and/or snacks, but that are also things that we can enjoy later if they aren’t eaten – such as cereals, bagels, English muffins, oatmeal, eggs, tortillas, and cheese.  Quesadillas with tortillas and cheese are quick and simple for meals or snacks.

I also have prepared a “sandwich bucket” with condiments and fill it with cold cuts and cheese and keep it on the bottom shelf in the refrigerator.  I often buy a container of potato salad from Costco (delicious!) and maybe some chips.  When guests arrive, I show them where all the makings are for breakfasts, lunches, and snacks.  This takes me off the hook to fix those meals and nobody goes hungry.

I usually prepare a couple of dinners ahead of time that can easily be reheated, such as meatballs and spaghetti sauce, cheese cannelloni, beef or chicken stroganoff.  This makes it a lot easier to prepare a meal after a day of sight seeing without a lot of work involved.

I also rely on Costco for help with other dinners.  They have a great roasted chicken for $4.99 that easily serves four.  They also have a wonderful Oriental Chicken Salad and great pizzas ready-to-bake.  I have purchased their meatloaf which comes in a package of two – this makes dinner for one night and either another dinner or leftovers for sandwiches.  I’m not pushing Costco – just the concept of what is available without requiring a lot of work.

I plan “leftovers” at least one night, maybe two – by the time we have all of this food in the refrigerator, there are always enough leftovers for lunches and dinners. 

Dining out doesn’t have to be expensive.  One place that usually works for everybody, and doesn’t cost an arm and a leg, is Souper Salad.  We also have a favorite restaurant in town that has a great Happy Hour menu between 4-6 on weekdays and their meals on the menu run from $2.50 to $5.00 per meal.  Sometimes, if my husband and I aren’t extremely hungry, we will split a meal.  Often there are leftovers from dining out that make good snacks or meals on another day.

Recreation

Our guests usually enjoy seeing the sites in and around the town.  We live in a historical town which offers a rich history.  There are local museums, an old fort from the 1800’s, beautiful Victorian homes, and lots of neat shops built around an Old Courthouse on the town square. Sometimes we’ll drive around town and look in some of the newer developments to see the homes that are currently being built.  (It doesn’t take a lot to make us, or our guests, happy!)

There are many beautiful scenic drives that make for nice day trips.  We have often discovered new places we haven’t seen when our friends and family visit.  I never grow tired of nature and all of its’ beauty, so I can go on the same scenic drive over and over again without tiring of it.

We have a neat little local zoo with rescued animals from the forest.  My husband and I bought annual passes because we enjoy going there ourselves – the entrance fee for guests is nominal.

There are a multitude of places to hike in our area, so we can enjoy doing this with our visitors – if they are more fit than we are, or have more energy, then they will venture out on their own!

We have many National Parks within an hour or two from our house, including the Grand Canyon .  We are able to get free admission for anyone in our vehicle with my husband’s Golden Eagle Passport. 

We also enjoy going to the bookstore at the mall to browse and read.  Warning:  If you are with others who enjoy shopping, don’t get caught up in their shopping energy.  You can enjoy “window shopping” while they are spending.  My sisters love to shop – I have learned to simply enjoy the experience of being together!

In the evenings we enjoy a video rental, a fun game, sitting on our screened-in porch listening to nature and visiting.  Afterall, people generally come to see you because they enjoy the visiting, right?

Routines

As much as possible, stick with your normal routines for sleeping and exercise.  We are early-to-bed people, and I’m not too much fun to be around if I don’t get my sleep!  We came up with a great solution for those who like to stay up later than us.  We bought a 13” TV/VCR combo and put it in the guest room.  We maintain our early bedtime, and if our visitors want to stay up longer, they watch a movie in the guest room. 

I also feel much better if I stick to my daily exercise routine.  I have never found any guest offended by me taking the time to exercise.  If anything, I find my motivation wanes when we have visitors, so the key is for me to remain diligent with my own daily rituals.

I put together a basket for the guest bathroom that has little shampoos, conditioner, soaps, q-tips, cotton balls, toothpaste, lotion, extra toothbrushes, and wash cloths..  A lot of these are things that I have accumulated from motels on vacation.  I try to think of what things I would need for myself, including towels, drinking glasses, a night light, etc.  Even though they might not need all of these things, it makes it more accessible for them if they do. 

Take small periodic breaks for yourself.  Whether it is to read, call a friend, take a nap, watch a special television program, or take a bath – building in little breaks will help keep you more relaxed.  Your visitors will probably welcome these little respites too – being around others 24/7 can wear on anyone’s nerves.

The real key to enjoying your guests – and having fun during the visit – is to establish boundaries that work for you.  Often we get so caught up in the need to take care of everybody else, that it affects the pleasure of a visit.  Remember to take care of yourself – I will almost guarantee that your visitors will not mind a bit!

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Copyright © 2004 by Karen Kuebler

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